Moonshadows

Hyper-Parenting Needs The Right Stuff

June 16th, 2006

Chapter Three of Hyper-Parenting: Are You Hurting Your Child by Trying Too Hard? by Alvin Rosenfeld, MD, and Nicole Wise is called “The Right Stuff.”

Buying stuff starts even before conception sometimes. Rooms are filled with stuff before the baby is born. I admit, some of what we bought was useful for us. My first child hated the baby swing, but the second loved it. At times, it was the only way I was able to get a break from holding her. (And there’s the perfectionist guilt again - how vould I call myself an AP parent if I actually *gasp* put her down sometimes!) But we had too many toys and too many clothes. One thing I mostly avoided was the educational stuff for babies. Babies don’t need to use their time productively. Our lives and homes are stimulating enough. Baby’s favorites? The car keys and the cellphone.

The stuff phenomenon continues as children age. Sports equipment, educational toys, comptuers, books, games, clothes. Clutter, materialistic values and reliance on stuff tends to take away our joy of being. The time and effort it takes to care for the things can take away from the time and energy we would rather be investing in our families. (”Pick up your stuff!”)

Why do we buy so much stuff for our kids? Do they really need it? Do we think our lives will be easier and better if we keep buying more stuff? Are we afraid that we are being negligent if the kids don’t have the latest edutainment toy? My girls love to create their own toys from sticks and rocks they find in the woods. Of course, there are some toys that we have bough that have been a constant big hit, such as Legos and the Gamewright games. Again, I’m not aiming for perfection, but intentional moderation.

I try to really consider the impact of my purchases. Even stuff that is used or on sale has an impact on our lives. It is not always easy to remember to be intentional about my purchases. I do fairly well when it comes to buying stuff for the kids, but I have much room to improve when it comes to buying stuff for myself and the house.

Entry Filed under: Simple Living, Parenting