Hyper-Parenting: Is Winning Everything?
Chapter Seven of Hyper-Parenting: Are You Hurting Your Child by Trying Too Hard? by Alvin Rosenfeld, MD, and Nicole Wise is called “Is Winning Everything?”
My answer is no. And I want my children to know that. While I am still working on (and will always be amending) my definition of success, it does not include being a winner in the traditional sense. Success for me includes balance, happiness, serving others, being reflective, learning, …
I’m not raising superstars. I’m not willing to give up my life completely in order to raise a superstar. I don’t judge my own success on whether or not my child is a “Superstar”. Does that make me a bad parent? No, it absolutely does not.
I question myself, what do I want my children to get out of life and how can I help them to get there while retaining my notion of self? To be clear, some things that I do are are not my first choice on what I’d do if I were without children, and I do not completely ignore the presence of my chilren. However, I will try not to be pushed, pulled or guilted to the point where I feel I am giving up who I am to help them be who they are. In order for my kids to thrive, I need to stay intact.
What do you think entails success for you and your children?
2 comments June 20th, 2006